Ever feel like you have dug yourself a hole (with words), but you can’t stop talking and you just keep digging that hole deeper and deeper? To the point where you can’t remember why you started digging it to begin with? Then you get all turned around and don’t know how to get out?
I think humans (and by humans, I mean me…) are really good at confusing themselves when strong emotions are involved. The more confused we are, the less likely we are to have to reach a conclusion. This subconscious tactic seems to be most often used when either possible conclusion is scary.
Clarity can be elusive. Life can be scary. I don’t like that. Every time I think I’ve kicked fear in the teeth, it resurfaces with a new face. And sometimes I feel like people draw me out of the hole just to wound me. Thus, the nice warm, safe hole in the ground.
So my conclusion is…I don’t have one. And that’s how it is sometimes. I’ma just stay in this hole until there’s a good reason to come out. Ha.
…and yes I’m aware this is not the first time I’ve blogged about hiding in holes. So what. Maybe I like the dirt: