Smad.

I may have left a recent frustrating situation in a furious blazing bomb of glory.  What to do…? It happens. Actually this is the first time it has happened for me this way. So I’m analyzing myself and figuring out why I have felt the explosive emotion in the way I do, and what to do to move forward. This post is my self-therapy, if you couldn’t tell!

I had a lot written here…but I decided it’s just too personal. And the details don’t matter so much. [DELETE]

Three things:

  1. Venting, done appropriately and in a healthy manner, is good for you.
    If you have pent up anger, frustration, or sadness, let it out. It is much better than the alternative, which is to keep it bottled up or pretend it doesn’t exist, because it will manifest in one way or another.
  2. Give yourself space and distance to deal with it.
    Figure out where the hurt is really coming from. It may be from a much older and deeper source, but the present situation is merely drawing it out.
  3. Recover your power.
    If someone or something is getting under your skin, or you feel like they are in your head and you can’t get way from it, you are giving them more of your power than they deserve. Take your power back. Don’t
    let someone else’s behavior control how you feel.

I would like to introduce a word to you that I think everyone should be familiar with. Thanks to my brother and my sister-in-law for teaching me. Haha.

Smad = hurt feelings mixed with anger; mad and sad at the same time

An extremely useful word.

I now release you back into your lives, armed with those three tips for dealing. Knowing is one thing…implementing is another…may the force be with you.

My mantra for the week:

51d1c0586ef324cacedc053ff261cc82

Something good is happening…

It is so fascinating to watch life unfold, to watch my own growth.  I’ve been paying attention to things that have been changing recently.  I noticed today that I can say for the first time that I have developed a secure trust in myself, specifically in my ability to choose. My actual ability to choose or intuit hasn’t changed, but my confidence in that ability has.
I no longer second and third-guess. And that is a big deal for me.

This has been a long time coming, since I used to constantly question my conclusions. I was pretty sure they were alright, but I always felt “iffy” until I got some kind of reassurance or confirmation from another source. Today is the first day I realized that I don’t rely on it like a crutch anymore. Of course additional confirmation is welcome and sometimes appropriate, but in general the feeling of insecurity related to this is gone.

I have been given a lot of tools and blessings. I know how to use them for their intended purposes. So I am using them! Without worry or wondering. It’s such a feeling of freedom!!

I am strong and I am good to go! /flex

This is about how I feel ;)
Cape Perpetua, Oregon Coast